Episode 138: Wonderful Christmas(h)time

Last night’s episode, aka the third SttM Xmas special, begins with a ridiculous mashup of the Mighty Monarch’s henchmen doing their karaoke Garage Band version of Sir Paul McCartney’s (rightly) reviled and hated Christmas confection vs Rhythm Scholar’s cut-n-scratch remix. The latter samples the Rankin/Bass pseudo-classic “Santa Claus is Coming to Town” to delightful effect, and I in turn couldn’t help sampling the “That sounded terrible” quote for use as a leitmotif of sorts. I didn’t use it as much as I wanted, though, because most of the mix sounds (if I do say so myself) pretty dang good.

From there we get to the real mashup action, with hip-hop beats serving as the background for Christmas standards and Christmas music backing up hip hop proclamations. There’s also Sky Ferreira’s ode to the American holiday traditions seen through the lens of Japanese appropriation, “Omanko;” Fairmont’s country-fried take on (possibly) the most depressing Christmas standard; the Christmas song from the anime series Toradora; a proto-ska cover by Jamaican musicians who have all but certainly never seen snow on Christmas; and a German industrial holiday stomp (featuring spare ribs and egg nog and porridge on the porch).

Then we get to the close and things turn, I’m almost embarrassed to admit, downright pornographic with the one-two gay-straight punch of Pansy Division’s “Homo Christmas” and A Plus D’s holiday version of “Dick In A Box.” The latter soars right through the one hour mark, so what else is there to do but keep it going for another five minutes with a couple of warmdown tunes: the Salsoul Orchestra’s downright sentimental version of “Silent Night” and, to close it out, the Winechuggers’ timeless salute to being drunk and alone for the holidays, “(I Was) Drunk (On Christmas)”

So there you have it! Another holiday music episode down! Maybe next year I do a Channuka episode and have the whole month set…

• Henchmen – Wonderful Christmastime
• Rhythm Scholar vs Paul McCartney – Wonderful Christmastime (Rhythm Scholar Kringle Kut Remix)
• DJ McFly – If You Jinglin’ (Vince Guaraldi vs. Jay-Z vs. Common)
• dj BC – 8-Bit Hip-Hop Christmas (Black EL vs Bit Shifter)
• DJ Flack – Insane in the Winter Wonderland (Rosemary Clooney vs Cypress Hill vs Mexicali Brass)
• Sky Ferreira – Omanko [Night Time, My Time]
• Lenlow – ¿Dónde Está Santa Claus?
• dj BC – Cold Chillin with Stevie (Stevie Wonder vs Juice Crew Allstars vs Harry Potter vs Bob and Doug MacKenzie)
• Divide & Kreate – No Sleep Till Christmas (Beastie Boys vs Wham!)
• Fairmont – Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas [A Very Merry Christmas Compilation]
• Ami-Tan and the Palmtop Tiger – Holy Night (Christmas song from Toradora)
• ATOM – Wonderland Walker (Peggy Lee vs Fats Domino vs Bjork)
• Cheekyboy – Give It To Me, Little Drummer Boy (Johnny Cash vs Fatman Scoop vs Fiddy)
• Miss Frenchie – White Christmas (Electro Remix)
• Simms & Robinson – White Christmas [Coxsone’s Music]
• Divide & Kreate – Achtung X-Mash
• Voicedude – F#@% You, Santa! (Cee-Lo Green vs. Jackson 5)
• Pichard – I Want a New Limb For Christmas
• DJ John – Lonely Siberian Winter
• DJ C – Jungle Bells (Bumba Clause Mix ft. Murderbot)
• Pansy Division – Homo Christmas [Punk Rock Christmas]
• A Plus D – Xmas Dick In A Box (street version)
• Salsoul Orchestra – Silent Night [Christmas Jollies]
• Winechuggers – (I Was) Drunk (On Christmas) [The My Pal God Holiday Record]

BPM range: 95-160